Finding Forgiveness and Restoration
I was a little hesitant to recall the challenges in my past life. However, I want to share my testimony as a thanksgiving to the Lord who helped me be the Christian I am today.
It all began three days after my mother gave birth to me when my parents were divorced. My mother brought me to stay with my grandmother. I did not even know my father's name. When I was five years old, my grandmother died of a terrible disease. So my mother sent me to live with my uncle, and she left me with him for two years.
My life was hell; he hurt me physically and mentally. He forced me to work by raising cattle in the fields, and did not let me go to school – until my life eventually collapsed. He had hurt my soul and even spoiled my virginity. I was so sad and ashamed that I wanted to die. I felt no one loved me, not even my mother.
Eventually I ran away and found a Christian Foundation where I was cared for and loved. It was there that I got to know Jesus as my Saviour and was baptised. I was 12 years old.
My life was all beautiful and warm when I was at the Foundation. I felt valued, and I was very happy to go out and preach the good news of Jesus in many places, even on the road. I wanted more people to be saved and loved as I was. But when I entered my teens, my faith grew cold. I began to have a boyfriend and my schooling began to deteriorate. I became stubborn and detached myself from my loving Christian family. Worst of all, I rarely spent time with God.
Then I got married when I was only 16 years old. At that time, I was like a blind person who could not see that I was lost. Even after marriage, I did not find happiness. My husband spent all our money on drinking with his friends. When I caught him having an affair with another woman, he tried to force me to accept his relationship by hitting me every day for two weeks until I ran away from him. Soon after, I realised that I was pregnant, but at that time, my husband had fled to another country to escape arrest after breaking the law in Thailand. I felt terribly confused and hurt, and I called upon God to help me. Then one of my mentors who had raised me at the Foundation came to encourage me and brought me back to the Lord again. He gave me respite at a bible college in Chiang Mai where I gave birth to my daughter, whom I named Esther.
I later met a Christian man who could accept my daughter and my past. We got married, and I followed him to live with his family in Mae Soon village in the remote mountains of Phrao. It was there where I met Pastor Daniel who had brought a team on a mission trip to visit my village. When Pastor Daniel invited me to continue my studies and serve God at his church in Phrao town, I believed that God had given me a new opportunity join the church family. My husband and I came down from the mountains to serve at the Little Candles Methodist Church where we have been members for nearly two years now.
Since then, I have given birth to another son whom I named Peter. That name is a testimony to the forgiveness and restoration that God had given me after I abandoned Him, just as Jesus forgave and restored Peter after he denied Him three times.
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